Loathing Daycare
August 8, 2001
http://www.lewrockwell.com/decoster/decoster35.html
Loathing Daycare
by Karen De Coster
Something unfashionable
became fashionable during the early 1980's, and I'm not talking about greed,
junk bonds, or Ronald Reagan. But rather, this is something that is truly
detestable, yet is a part of American culture every bit as much as Saturday
morning cartoons or Sunday church. The fad that I speak of is child daycare.
Daycare, slowly evolving throughout the 70's, became the rage of the 80's as
two-income households became the norm in middle-class America. After all, during
this time we watched tax rates creep upward and personal responsibility creep
downward, while Mom trotted off to work, and Dad came home from his job and
changed diapers and vacuumed carpets.
These days, what we are
witnessing is the first full generation of daycare kids having grown up. This is
a generation clearly lacking in virtue, morals, discipline, and classical
education. We complain about this all the time; of how young people today – in
general – are so disrespectful of adults and so culturally repulsive in their
preferences, behavior and dress. After
all, what we observe is a generation full of baggy pants five sizes
too big, frosted hair cut
into bizarre twists, and body piercings, where kids, and not all of them so
young, deform their faces and heads and private parts with two-dollar silver
bits purchased in filthy backrooms. Tattoos, obnoxious and unfeminine, adorn our
young women's bodies, making them look like backwater tramps straight out of
long-term incarceration. The music they listen to, from Marilyn Manson to
trash-rap, reveals that we have,
indeed, raised a
generation of humans that have little respect for the spirituality of life. The
kids call this "individualism". I call it collective rubbish. What we
now witness is daycare brats becoming adults.
I suppose parents thought
little ill effect would come to their children as they dumped them, daily, into
the hands of strangers, to be watched over, played with, and fed by these
strangers at daycare centers that soon became
substitute parents.
The picture of a typical
daycare family is an absurd one: rising early, the house is bustling with
stressed-out parents trying to get the children ready to be carted off, while
they also grapple with their own preparations for
work and the stress that
already awaits them in their workplace. Amidst the stress of typical child
antics in the morning, Mom is trying to clothe and feed everyone while she tries
to clothe and feed herself for a power day at
the office. Thinking about
it, how much quality attention can the kids really get when Mom is wrapped up in
preparing herself mentally for a long day at work or her meeting with the CFO?
The soccer Mom, as she is typically dubbed, speeds over to daycare, drops the
kids off at 7am, and gets to the office by eight o'clock. Working until 6pm, Mom
rips out of the office, having fallen behind in her work again today, but has no
choice but to get to the daycare center to pick up the kids by 7pm, because Dad
will be working late tonight. By the time she arrives home, the kids are
restless, misbehaving, and it is 7:30 or so before Mom and the kids pile out of
the
Explorer and into the
house.
Now, depending on the age
of the kids and their bedtimes, Mom has approximately a couple of hours to spend
with the kids. If dinner is prepared and cooked at home, then we can assume that
most of that time is taken up doing just that, all at a frantic pace, because
Mom is hungry and tired, Dad has just come home, and the kids are impatient.
Where, in all this commotion, can parents possibly find time to share themselves
with their children? After cooking and eating? Or is that time taken up with
housecleaning, fielding phone calls, maintaining the house, shopping, paying
bills, and just plain getting one's bearings in order? And of course, this
cycle repeats itself
daily, as the children are left with what little time remains after all the
necessary tasking is done.
These are horrible
circumstances for any child to have to bear. Already, the kids experience stress
and chaos as a normal part of their daily routine. Life's little enjoyments,
like quiet-time and personal reflection are not
even in the cards for kids
growing up in this family disorder. And then, add to that the numerous planned
activities like soccer, dance class, gymnastics, and hockey, and you have a
family that is no longer the epitome
of a family unit. Rather,
they find themselves spread out, each covering his or her own individual
activities, and coming together only under rare circumstances.
Now I know it is not
always possible for a woman to stay home with the children, either because of
economic circumstances or career choices. What I do know is that parents have
choices to make regarding their children,
choices that need to be
made before bringing those children into the world.
Parents are responsible for being attentive to their children, and
raising them as best they can. They are responsible for providing them with the
emotional and intellectual
tools they will need to grow in the world. Only parents and close family can do
that for a child, not the daycare centers.
At the daycare center,
parents entrust their children to strangers; strangers that have provided them
with a babysitting rate that was probably cheaper than the other daycare centers
they visited upon. At these centers,
young people who are paid
low wages and who are, typically, poorly trained, usually provide the childcare.
The childcare may be lax, it may be inattentive, or it may simply be abusive,
but it may be difficult for parents to gauge the overall quality of the
services. In a typical daycare unit, there are numerous children with few
supervisors. Whatever the laws for supervision may be, it is not sufficient to
replace real parenting.
As a child, I placed a
great premium on quiet-time and time spent alone indulging in my solo interests.
Whether the order of the day was creating some new artwork or reading my books,
or writing a story or listening to my
records, it was something
I found necessary for my peace of mind, and for the growth of my intellectual
capabilities. After school, I remember running home as fast as I could and
bursting into the house, heading straight for my room and all my little tasks
that lay before me. It was as much fun planning those activities as it was doing
them. I felt a sense of security and comfort, since I knew Mom was there, and
therefore, everything was going to be all right. I ran home because I knew it
was a place that I wanted to be. Now,
kids don’t run home to Mom anymore, because they have the latchkey stopover
that comes between school and home. The security of Mom may come hours after
school is over. During the summer months, for me, it was a whole day of various
things to do; things I wanted to do. I never could have survived a moment as a
daycare kid.
Can one who grew up like I
did even imagine living the chaos of the daycare center life? Gaggles of kids,
some screaming and some crying, some fighting and some sick, all letting loose
in an atmosphere void of parents, control, or set discipline. Even if there
exists a sense of discipline, where can a child get any peace, for instance, to
read or write or study, or to develop artistic or musical talents? There is no
peace, for a daycare kid is trapped
in a ritual of group
games, group projects, and group trips. The activities are planned, as are
lunchtime and naptime. Solo time, however, is not planned because it does not
exist. A child is forced into this groupthink
whether he likes it or
not. He has no access to his own "things", his own comforts that he
chooses, or his own hobbies. He's there to be babysat and to go along with the
rest of the group on its little projects, no matter how
uninteresting he may find
them. And he is expected to do that for eight, ten, twelve hours a day, every
day.
What happens to a high-IQ
child who is squeezed into this environment daily, as his time revolves around
activity after activity set around a group? How does the child become nurtured
to use his God-given gifts? He doesn't, you can bet. In the groupthink
atmosphere of childcare, the bright child is dumbed down to the lowest common
denominator in the group, and he is not allowed to go off independent of the
group and think as he might, do as he might, and create as he wants.
I know if I had grown up
in this hellish environment, I may have been part of the whole body-piercing,
tattooing thing out of a lack of respect for anyone, let alone myself. It's an
awful environment to put kids in, and yet,
expect them to come out of
it behaving as respectable and civilized adults.
The daycare-oriented society, instead, nurtures fiends that hang in
groups – at the malls, at the schools, in techno clubs, drug-and-sex parties,
and in the streets. They look like bums and they sniff glue, poisonous solvents,
and suck in helium to get their kicks. They take ecstasy to remove themselves
from reality and listen to creep music to display their own
unhappiness.
It's likely that this
generation, and those to follow, can not nurture great scholars and thinkers
like Lord Acton or Lysander Spooner. Besides the fact that the education system
is a shambles, we adults cannot expect kids to
grow unless we give them
the time and space to do it. In the daycare environment into which parents
thrust their children, there is no space and there is no opportunity for
personal growth. There is only a low-paid babysitter who sticks you in the midst
of the growth pattern of a dozen other kids. It's almost like raising kids has
become akin to raising rabbits or hamsters.
We must stop to ask what
has led people to make these decisions to treat their kids like that. What is it
that has superceded the raising and nurturing of their children? The answer is,
dependency on the Nanny State. After
all, the State has fostered a certain dependency upon the population; a
dependency that finds people unwilling to be responsible for the education and
nurturing of their own children. Parents have become so accepting of a
routine that allows them
to shove their children off to the free public school each day, they don't stop
to think for a moment that any of it is really their responsibility. Along with
that has come the government school's free-lunch programs, free breakfasts,
after-school group activities to keep kids out of the parent's hair, and of
course, latchkey. All of this serves to sway parents into thinking that the
State is more able than the parents to provide for kids and their needs.
Daycare, even if it is privatized business, came along as an extension of those
attitudes.
Parents have simply got to
take responsibility for the rearing of their own children, and they have got to
be willing to sacrifice their own wants in order to do so. Their priorities need
to shift from satellite dishes, two
new cars, and houses full
of electronics, to a more attentive environment in which kids can have their
abilities nourished and realize their intellectual potential. Life isn't easy,
and it surely is not made any easier by a
parasitic government that
robs every family of independence through criminal tax rates, redistribution
schemes, and regulatory madness. However, when parents claim economic excuses
for the lack of attention to their children, it is pointless. After all, parents
aren't forced to have children. It's a decision that needs much forethought
before the action is taken to bring babies into the world. The children are a
priority that has to be put ahead of everything else.
Let's start raising our
own children, whatever it takes. Keep them out of the hands of State educators
and replacement parents. For G-- sakes, give them a chance to lead a fruitful
life.
Karen De Coster is a
politically incorrect CPA, and an MA student in economics at Walsh College in
Michigan.
Copyright © 2001
LewRockwell.com
Child care aggression
http://www.ivanfoster.org/article.asp?date=6/1/2001&seq=3
"The more hours that
toddlers spend in child care, the more likely they are to turn out aggressive,
disobedient and defiant by the time they are in kindergarten, according to the
largest and most authoritative study of child
care and development ever
conducted." So said Shankar Vedantam of The Washington Post.
According to researchers,
this correlation held true regardless of whether the children came from rich or
poor homes, were looked after by a relative, a nanny or at a centre, and whether
they were girls or boys.
It remains unclear whether
reducing child care would reduce the risk that a child will turn into a
mean-spirited bully. And complicating matters further, good child care is
associated with increased skills in intellectual ability such as language and
memory, leading some academics to suggest that child care turns out children who
are "smart and nasty." The US government-sponsored research, which has
tracked more than 1,300 children at
10 sites across the
country since 1991, is bound to rekindle the debate over child care, a debate
that resonates across every income group and every demographic: How should
people balance work and family? And how should parents, especially mothers,
resolve the demands that are placed on them to be both breadwinners and
supermoms?
Children who spend more
than 30 hours a week in child care were more likely to be described with terms
such as "are more demanding, more noncompliant and they are more
aggressive." One factor that is never mentioned is discipline. Just why
children in child care turn out so aggressive and disobedient is not really that
hard to work out. Modern disciplinary methods (or should we say the lack of
them) leave the child very much its own boss. Limitations upon those in charge
of children as to what they may do in order to curb a child´s disobedience,
further exacerbate the problem. The child is taught that what it wants, it gets
if it kicks up a row about it. That sets it on the road to aggressiveness and
disobedience. Parents, pressurised
by modern child counsellors, and teachers curtailed in the measures open to them
by recent Europe-inspired legislation, means that the trends started in child
care continue in the home and school and society inherits another thug in a few
years´ time.
Anti-God, anti-Bible
thinking is what lies behind the madness of modern parenting. The result will be
an epidemic of disobedience and defiance amongst the next generations that is
too terrifying to contemplate. Thus
saith the LORD, Stand ye
in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk
therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk
therein, Jeremiah 6:16. To think that
all this is coming about
as the result of measures taken by those who believe that they are advancing
society by seeing the old ways of the Bible abolished.