LIBERAL JOKES

Liberal jokes

And then there was this one on how business is done in your nation's capital: The steps in front of Parliament Hill's Centre Block needed some repairs so bids are taken from contractors from across the country.

First, a contractor from Toronto looks it over. After measuring and figuring, he presents his bid. "I can do it for $19,000," he says. "I'd need $9,000 for materials, $9,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me."

Next, a contractor from Calgary does his measuring and calculating then says, "I'll do it for $17,000 -- $8,000 for materials, $8,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me."

Last, a Liberal-friendly advertising firm from Montreal steps up. Without even looking at the job site he says, "I'll do it for $57,000." Surprised at how high it is, the government man taking the bids asks him to explain it. "It's simple," he says, "$20,000 for me, $20,000 for you, and we hire the guy from Calgary."

THE OIL SHORTAGE

A lot of folks can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in Canada
Well, there's a very simple answer.
Nobody bothered to check the oil.

We just didn't know we were getting low.
The reason for that is purely geographical. 

Our OIL is located in Alberta, Newfoundland, Saskatchewan and B.C. 
Our DIPSTICKS are located in Ottawa, ONTARIO